Last week, I flew a 747.
In an industrial estate not far from Heathrow Airport, sits Cranebank, the British Airways' flight training and safety facility, which is used by 45 international airlines, including Qantas.
At one end of the old building you'll find a cabin safety training area, with partial models of planes and inflatable evacuation slides where crew and members of the public by arrangement undergo simulated flight disasters, such as a plane catching fire, to teach survival techniques.
The other end of the building contains seventeen flight simulators, which are boxes on hydraulic stands, like 1960s moon landing machines, where pilots undergo compulsory training on a full range of aircraft from A200s to Boeing 747s.
Pilots-in-training must spend 11 four-hour sessions in the simulators. It's mandatory for British Airways pilots to spend two days each six months in the simulators refining their skills.
Along with three others, I am invited to test my flying chops in one of the simulators, with the help of the preternaturally patient Andy Clubb, Cranebank's Corporate and Media Manager. Being a nervous flyer I'm excited. I figure that knowing how a plane operates from the flight deck should go a long way to soothing my anxieties.
The flight simulators are scary in themselves. Andy explains that they lift up to mimic full flight motion. If there's a problem (Like what?) we can escape by electrical bridge, ladder, or scramble net. But nothing has ever gone wrong, he adds.
I've always thought my moderate nervousness about flying was due to feelings of lack of control, but in the tight space of the deck, claustrophobia kicks in. There are barrages of switches and lights above my head and the control panel looks mind-bogglingly complicated. There's little wiggle space in the first and second officer's seats either.
The first volunteer sits in the pilot's seat with Clubb beside her. He quickly outlines the principles of flying a 747-400, explaining that it will be relatively simple. (Sure.) He has the controls like a driving instructor, so we won't be doing it alone. It's surprisingly easy to imagine we are flying the real thing, especially when the simulated 27 Left runway at Heathrow appears in the window and we're ready to take off.
It's way more complicated than what I'm about to explain, but essentially, as Clubb will have some of the controls like foot pedals, all we need to do for take-off is follow the autopilot screen and keep a little box as close to the intersection of two magenta lines as possible ("follow the magenta"). After take-off the "pilot" will bank right for a bit and then the simulator will replicate landing, where we will have to learn to "flare" to hold the nose up when the warning voice tells us we're 30 feet above the runway.
The simulator makes the full sounds and movements of a 747, shaking so much we have to be strapped in and keep cameras secure or they will tumble off the shelves. Our mobiles have to be on flight mode or else they may damage the equipment, which is worth $17.4 million-$19.3 million.
When it's my turn I find it terrifying. This is plainly ridiculous. It's only a simulator, but I'm sure I'll crash the plane immediately. I'm a bad driver and haven't really driven for years. I ask Clubb whether any other civilians like us have tried to crash it for thrills and he says, "None. It's competitive. Everybody wants to land it well."
Take-off and flying with Clubb doing most of it is only a matter of pulling the heavy control column forward, backwards or turning it to the right as I take off above Heathrow. Landing is a matter of "chasing the magenta." Still, I bounce along the runway because I forget the 747 is two-storeys high and try to keep descending. (Another "pilot" veers off the runway sideways, so I don't feel so bad.)
Has the experience made me less nervous about flying? No. But I have heaps of respect for the aviation industry and the rigorous training of pilots at airlines such as BA.
So, what if there's an emergency like in the movie Airport 1975 and the pilots are incapacitated? Will I be able to step up like the stewardess played by Karen Black and fly the aircraft?
You better hope you're not on that plane.
The writer was a guest of British Airways. See britishairways.com/en-gb/baft.
